she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Randomize
