i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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