I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Bring me that man meat
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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