Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
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