hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Randomize
