We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
