i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
