can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
