Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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