i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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