if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Randomize