So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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