they need to just BURY HIM!
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
