did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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