she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
My vagina is officially offended.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
