My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
