I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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