brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
if you like me you must not know who I am
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
