yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize