The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize