im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
