Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
