Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
