How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
