Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
