You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
420 ftw
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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