Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
