Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
i've created a new STD.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
