I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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