My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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