We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize