Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
It was a blind-side dick pic.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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