Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
