My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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