So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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