Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
