I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
