Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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