He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
