The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I would fuck him just for his dog
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize