I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
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