Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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