If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize