Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
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