Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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