Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize