We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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