well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Randomize
