Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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