i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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